Yukon Jen: A Series of Random Events

Dear Writer,

Sorry for the somewhat impersonal nature of this note, but given the number of submissions and time constraints, it’s the best we can do.

Thanks for submitting your work to Fresh! Our literary committee has made their decisions — we will not be able to use your essay.
This does not necessarily mean we didn’t enjoy your writing, just that it didn’t work for this show.

Please don’t hesitate to submit in the future.

Thanks,

Fresh! Light Literary Committee

A few nights ago, I went out for After Hours at the Ravenous Restaurant here in Healdsburg. That is, I went just to hang out and get a bit of conversation and meet some interesting people before I turned in myself. Ravenous is a local restaurant in an old house on Center Street. The entire backyard is the backyard patio and bar. It’s a pretty cool atmosphere. I like showing up later–you meet more locals (everybody who’s getting off of their shifts from somewhere else).

And if you know me and my Princess Donkey ways, I just start talking.

That night, I ended up talking to two out-of-town gentlemen who’d met one another at law school in London, England. One was living in Hong Kong now, the other–still in London. They were both here on holiday getting a bit of the California sun. They’d made it to Healdsburg after a few days in San Francisco. They were a bit tired, but they did ask where I could recommend they should go visit the next day.

I gave them an itinerary…based on nothing else other than the places I liked (but I did cross-check with a few other locals at the bar). I’ll eventually write that itinerary up and post it on HealdsburgMagazine.com (my other online home). But today, I was thinking about our conversation.

We somehow ended up talking about my favourite BBC series (the original OFFICE series, and something that’s showing on BBC America right now: Coupling). I tell them I think Coupling is the British version of Friends. AND IT IS SO MUCH MORE FUNNY. I laugh my head off at the dialogue. But, I guess that’s British and maybe more Canadian humour, not American.

I did say that I was a huge fan of the HBO series: Sex and the City. For a number of reasons: I like the writing in the series. It was daring, dashing, bold, and beautiful ALL AT THE SAME TIME. I could identify with almost everything that happened to every character in every episode. I also have a fetish for sexy shoes.

The guy from Hong Kong asked me which character I identified with the most. I thought about it for a second before I replied: “What you guys don’t get is that every woman is every character. We are all sassy, sexy, professional, and demure (Carrie, Samantha, Miranda, Charlotte). Those four characters are the four cornerstones to each and every one of our personalities.”

That’s it. That’s what you have to know about us. You also have to understand when it is appropriate to start a conversation with any one of those four personalities.

I’m not really writing anything that Sex and the City fans don’t know. But if you’re a guy, and you’re reading my blog, and you’re not really a fan of the HBO series, I just wanted to let you know that fact.

Another thing I told them–about modern women today. We have jobs. We have careers. We work hard. We have our own salaries and financial portfolios. Some of us even own our own homes or residences.

I think who we’re looking for when we’re actually looking for a relationship is NOT someone who can take care of us. We can take care of ourselves. It would be good if YOU could take care of yourself and contribute to taking care of a household–yes, I mean cooking and cleaning and laundry and shopping and all the household tasks that your mother used to do.

The only part of us that we need you to take care of our hearts.

PS: It would also be good if you liked to dance in the living room.

I can’t seem to have one without the other. I like food. In order to be able to eat all the food that I like, I need to exercise. In order to exercise, I need good music.

But whatever, I have to start a new exercise regime. I can’t have all this food making a permanent home on my butt.

Last night, I started organizing my music files on this computer–to get a really good workout rhythm going. Here is my music list so far:

• Desafinado (OK. I know I may be the only one in the world who runs to Stan Getz, but this one gets me going).
• Mary Mary - Chumbawumba (good to say a bit of a prayer before I really get going).
• Amnesia - Chumbawumba (because I eventually want to forget–turn my brain off and just go).
• Stronger than You Think I am - Rachel Ferguson’s new track. I LOVE this one. I can hear it on a movie soundtrack sometime. I’d put it at the beginning of the movie–then the movie would be the story of how she gets to where she’s singing about. Then–probably in my dreams, the closing shot is her driving a scooter across the Manhattan Bridge.
• All Day Long - another Rachel Ferguson. “Too cool for these games…” She’s so young. Where’d she get all this gender saavy?
• Sexbomb - Tom Jones (I can dream can’t I?)
• Kryptonite - Three Doors Down (part of my snowboarding mix)
• Born Slippy- From the Trainspotting soundtrack (another song on my snowboarding mix).
• Need You Tonight - INXS classic
• Wasting Time - Collective Soul (another one of my favourites that just helps get me going).
• New Orleans is Sinking - Tragically Hip. How can this song not be on my top-ten energy songs?

Oh…wait a minute. That’s 11 songs. Well, I’m just starting. I’ll start with these now. I know I have more…I just have to find the digital versions of them.

I’m open to suggestions though. What songs get you moving? I’ve gained 10 pounds this summer. And if my friend and I are going to do the Yukon River Paddle Quest next June, I’ve got some training to do.

My current perspective….

I’ve been talking to my friend in Yellowknife. In fact, I’m going to call her now. Except, I have to write a blog entry before I can. It’s been too long since I made my last one–and I’m due.

We had a great chat the last time we talked. I think we talked for three hours. Now. How’s that for friendship?

In fact, that was the topic of the conversation (or that’s how we started off). We talked about friends and our friendships and what they mean to us. She laughed and said that saying was true…that one that says something about you know who your true friends are when they show up to help you move. She was relieved at how many of her friends showed up to help her move her stuff into her new place and she’s grateful for that. She was just grateful.

When I moved from Bush-Field last year, my friend Quebec-Martin showed up with his pickup and helped me move back to Healdsburg. AND I have to say that was quite a relief. He also helped me quite a bit once I was here. In fact, I believe I have a whole entire photo essay on building the composter. I didn’t have any furniture or kitchen supplies, but I knew the first thing I needed was a composter–and he and Humberto helped me make it.

Another thing we talked about last time was texture. One of her friends had given her a compliment (the day of her move) and said something about texture. That she was a person who had texture. My friend couldn’t have felt better. What a compliment!! I think so too. I like that.

I told what I’d told another friend of mine once when he asked me what I thought of Cobie Chaillet.

“I was thinking more about Colbie Chaillet on the way to Petaluma this morning as I was listening to Dianah Washington. I realized what I had described was mainstream was more like–lack of texture. That’s how I would describe it. Lack of texture.

I like music with depth, complexity, range, and texture…in fact. In fact, it turns out, that’s how I like my wine. And..now as I’m typing this, I realize I like people like that too. I like people who have depth, complexity, range, and texture.”

And that’s how I think my friend is–and I can only aspire to have those qualities too. I guess life is just a work-in-progress.

ON THAT NOTE….it’s time to publicly announce that we (my friend and I) have a goal. We are challenging ourselves to compete in the Yukon River Quest next summer. Isn’t that exciting? AND we have a whole year to prepare. When she told her dad, he said he thought he’d go too and he’d ask our former Outdoor Ed teacher Cliff Dunaski to go along with him.

I wonder what it’ll be like twenty years later? OMG!!!!!!!!Twenty years later!!!! We were part of the graduating class of ‘89.

Hi Urban Yukon,

My dad called me up on Saturday night. He says: “Jennie, I’m in trouble.” I immediately get worried that something’s happened.

He says: “I lost some files. All the pictures of your mother’s quilts. We can’t find them. I even went back and did a system restore.”

Ugh..Ugh..

I get him to tell me more about what’s happened. But they don’t know. There was a folder in the Photos directory called Quilts. It was there. Then it wasn’t there.

That file had all of the pictures of every quilt my mum has ever made. AND THEY DIDN’T HAVE BACKUPS.

I got him to look in the recycle bin. Not there. I got him to install Picasa (because Picasa sees all the media on your machine). No luck.

They’re gone.

Does anybody know what we should do? Or who we can call if there is something we can do to recover those pictures?

Any suggestions or direction.

We would really appreciate it.

Really.

Just a quick blog post this morning before I rush off.

One thing I’m glad I have access to outside of Canada is cbc.ca and radio3.cbc.ca. Thank you Canada for your Canadian Content regulations. This year, I’ve discovered Buck 65, Bedouin Soundclash, and now these guys:

I don’t know what I would do without you CBC. If there’s one reason to be proud to be Canadian, this is it for me.

It’s a little late in coming today, I know. AND I have absolutely no excuse. None what-so-ever (that the blog entry is late). But here it is…a blog entry for my Dad.

And now, I am just going to take this moment to tell the world I love my Dad. We had our ups and downs and for awhile in the late 1990s, and we weren’t talking. But we figured it out. And we are talking now. And we actually have a pretty good relationship. He’s a real person. That’s what I like so much about my Dad. He’s real. He doesn’t pretend to be someone he’s not. He doesn’t apologize for who he is. He just is.

One summer when I was home for my parent’s 40th wedding anniversary, we were talking about what (and maybe who) people believe in. And he stood at the kitchen counter and looked over at me and said: “Jennie. Know what I believe in?”

He motioned outside at Golden Horn Mountain. “I believe in those rocks.”
He motioned out another window, “I believe in those trees.”
He motioned out to the back yard, “I believe in your mother’s garden.”

That’s one of my favourite quotes from my Dad. “I believe in those rocks. I believe in those trees. I believe in your mother’s garden.”

I think his quote means that his beliefs are more tangible than most. He believes in what he knows exists. He knows that the mountain will be there tomorrow. It’s going to be a mountain tomorrow, standing as tall and firm and as steadfast as it’s ever been. He isn’t expecting that the mountain will be anything more than a mountain tomorrow. And the mountain is not expecting him to be anything more than he is today. Can you have a more healthy relationship?

The same with the trees. Respect the trees and they will respect you.

My mother’s garden. Now. I know how much they both work on my mother’s garden–so I don’t just think that the garden just belongs to my Mum. As much as they attend to and nourish that garden, it nourishes and attends to them back. In the brief growing season in the Yukon, they will harvest enough vegetables to get them through the summer and a good part of the winter.

So here’s what my Dad has taught me: Believe in what you know exists. Believe in yourself. Know where your roots are and what you believe in. Be firm, strong, and steadfast in your beliefs. Don’t pretend to be somebody you’re not and don’t apologize for who you are. Have respect for others but don’t forget to respect yourself. And, give as much as you want to receive.

Oh. And laugh hard along the way.

Click here for all the blog entries about my Dad.

A note from Rach’s father this morning…

“Rachel won the CHUM Emerging Artist of the Month. Her new song “Stronger Than You Think I Am” is getting national radio play over the CHUM network. Other stations are beginning to add it. KISS FM Ottawa. Tonight “Stronger Than You Think I Am” is challenging “Disturbia” by Rihanna. That’s on Hot 89.9 at 9:00 our time. Listen Live at: www.hot899.com”

WAY TO GO RACH! I’m so proud of you.

So, if you’ve been reading my blog at all, you know a little bit about Rachel Ferguson. She is a 18-year-old singer songwriter from Alymer, Quebec (the greater Ottawa-Gatineau region). And, she’s kicking ass! I love it.

Visit her myspace page (myspace.com/rachelfergusonmusic). Become part of her community. Leave a comment. OR Better yet, call your local radio station and request her.

She was out in the bush for two weeks. I’d called last Sunday and we just chatted about how to feel feminine if you are out in the bush with a group of guys. She just said: “I don’t.”

Then she also clarified: “I don’t think I’d want to be a girl out here. Where would that get me? I have to work with everybody back in Yellowknife.” Then she said something interesting. She said that when you’re out in the bush for so long, people you’d never find interesting under normal circumstances start looking interesting. She giggled. And THAT’s when you know you need to get back to the real world.

Then we talked about a few things we do to feel feminine. “As soon as I get out of the bush,” she says, “I take a bubble bath. With wine and candles and aromatherapy and everything. And I clean up from being in the bush. I soak. I wash all the grub and smoke off. And shave.”

We talked about shaving for a minute and discussed that we both like clean-shaven men. We also talked about who should get a hair cut and a shave and how a trim and a shave takes a guy a long way (from being non-interesting to making us do a double take–quite literally).

We also talked about tips and tricks for shaving. Girls know what I mean. We all talk to our girlfriends about what works and what doesn’t work and we recommend beauticians who treat us well. And we’ve all had a terrible, horrendous experience at one time or another. So we talk and laugh. And I guess, we just bond. We bond over girl talk.

Then I asked her: “When you are just one of the guys, at which point are you a girl in a group of guys?” and, “Do you talk girl-talk to a guy friend?”

I don’t. Well. I don’t anymore. I’ve had to learn what is girl-talk and what is girl-talking-to-a-guy talk. And–well vice versa. And believe me, I had to learn the hard way. I now I like to think I have a better filter.

My friend did some research on her own.

If you are a group of girls and there is one guy, it’s ok to talk about things like bubble baths, bikini lines, and shaving legs.

If you are one girl and one guy (and he is not gay), that’s a borderline conversation. It’s a flirty conversation. Because it gives him a visual. Because if the guy is spending time with you and you are both single, there is a HUGE chance that he’s hoping that he won’t be single for too long. Or minimally, he’ll get to hook up with you.

So basically girls, beware if you are talking one-on-one with a guy friend. Know if you think he’s a friend or if he thinks he’s a potential boyfriend. Be careful you don’t say anything that will give him a visual (unless you want to of course). Because…you’ll know when he brings it up again that it was a HUGE mistake. You’ll know by the way he mentions it. You’ll know by the look on his face. You’ll just know. And you’ll feel betrayed. You’ll feel ick. You’ll feel like you lost a friend.

Which is usually exactly what happens.

We did wonder though–Do guys need girl talk? How do they figure things out–if they don’t talk about it?

She did research the other way too. Girls, if you’re just one of the guys–don’t talk about body fluids (yours or theirs). That is apparently TMI.